Surgery, Stitches, and What they don't tell you

WARNING *** this post includes disgusting and graphic pictures***

On June 17th I, Camille, got carpal tunnel surgery. This wouldn't be a big deal, except it was for my right hand. I wanted to share with you what the doctor told me and then I'll tell you what REALLY happened.

The surgeon said that he would make a small incision on my palm, slice a tendon, and then it would be as simple as relieving a pinched straw. I would have stitches and after a month or so, I would be back to normal. Well, thats when I should have paused to consider if I should ever have surgery...How could cutting my hand possibly make ME normal?

On the day of surgery, I got to get up really early in the morning. I got to skip breakfast. I got to pay a large co-pay before they would let me change into a gown that cost about $2. I got to sit in a small room and hang out in the $2 gown and watch other people hanging out in their $2 gowns. Then, it got really fun. I got to get an IV. The nurse had to poke me twice, which actually was pretty good. They NEVER get me on the first poke. EVER. Then, they finally took me back to surgery. As I was wheeled into the room I heard "The Sun Will Come Out Tomorrow" being blasted over the speakers in the operating room. For a brief moment I wondered if they could catch me if I jumped and ran away. Who wants someone to slice you open if they are listing to Annie? Did they want me to beg to be killed? The anesthesiologist told me he gave me some stuff in my IV that would "relax" me and then he would give me the stuff to make me sleep. Funny! Im a mother of 4, I had spent the last week preparing the house so I could have surgery, and I got up early for this lovely experience. I didn't need help going to sleep. So the last thing I remember hearing was "Camille, I will give you the sleepy stuff as soon as we get heart monitor on you." Humm. Apparently the "low dose, relax" is all I need!

Well, after surgery (which was only 15 mins) I got to "recover". This is where lots of people like to come look at you and the blood pressure cuff cuts the blood off, and where you ask the same question over and over..."what time is it?". My personal favorite about the recovery room is the recovery nurse (male) and Keith talking about guns. The recovery nurse spent time showing us different draw positions, different ways to shoot, and how cool it is to practice all of this. While they were having all kinds of exciting talk about guns, I realized I couldn't feel my hand or stand up.

I got to have my hand bandaged for 2 weeks. I couldn't get it wet or dirty. Again, it is my right hand. The only hand I use. I realized it would be a long 2 weeks when after being home for an hour I had to pee. I know... TMI. Well, Eh Humm, I had to re-learn some potty training skills I had learned many years ago. Just try using ONLY your left hand for a while. The next day when I had to shower, I had another Ehh humm experience when I had to figure out how to wash my hair using only my left hand. Sounds easy, you say. Well, smarty pants, what hand are you going to hold the shampoo bottle with? What hand do you pour the shampoo into? I won't even go into the "deodorant episode". Ok, I will. The doctor neglected to tell me how I was supposed to put deodorant on my left side using only my left hand. I dare you to try that tomorrow morning.

For the first couple of days, Corrine had to comb my hair. I had to get a neighbor to help comb the girls hair for ballet. I couldn't drive the car and hold my cell phone. Not that I would EVER talk on the phone and drive... that was just an example.

I have found that Heavenly Father was so wise. He really thought that 2 hand thing through. I had to relearn how to eat, dress, comb my hair, comb the girls hair, buckle seat belts, do dishes, update the blog, check e-mails, laundry, and enjoy farm town.

Ok, not for the squeamish... here are pictures of my hand.





Because the kids were so good while my hand was out of comission, we took them to get some ice cream for Family Home Evening. Kids, you were great helpers and Im so proud of you. You really did rise to the occassion.